We’re New Yorkers with $3.8M. We Plan to Retire in South Carolina, but My Wife Worries We Will Regret It.
We love the better weather and lower taxes of the South. My wife worries about missing family and losing the friend group that we built over decades.
Question: We’re New Yorkers retiring with $3.8 million and considering a move to South Carolina for better weather and lower taxes. We can sell our $1.3 million home and buy a similar one for $600K. My wife worries about missing our family, rebuilding a social life and making friends. I think we will be fine. Am I being unrealistic?
Answer: New York can be a great place to raise a family and launch a successful career. But it can also be an expensive place for retirees.
With a top tax rate of 10.9% and just a small pension exclusion, it can be difficult to maintain a comfortable lifestyle in New York without the promise of a large salary. (For more on New York taxes, read our New York Tax Guide.) Unsurprisingly, New York is one of the top states people moved out of in 2025, according to a United Van Lines study.
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South Carolina, meanwhile, was one of the top states people moved to in that same report. If you're a pair of New Yorkers with a $3.8 million nest egg, you might be contemplating a retirement move to South Carolina. Even though you have a lot of money to work with, your savings could easily get eaten up by high income taxes, property taxes and, depending on your ZIP code, local taxes.
If you have a home worth $1.3 million, you might easily find a similar one for much less in South Carolina, where real estate remains more affordable. That change could allow you to pocket your equity and further pad your savings.
It's also pretty easy to make the case that winters in South Carolina are much milder than those in New York. That alone could be a draw.
If you're eager to make a move but your wife is hesitant because you don't have much of a social network there, that's understandable. While it's good to be positive and assume you'll make friends, it's a valid concern on her part. Here's how to navigate it.
"There is no real replacement for cuddling the grandkids on the couch." — Gil Baumgarten
Don't overlook the social aspect
During your working years, your job can serve as a social outlet. In retirement, you lose that. If you're relocating to an area where you don't know many or any people, it can be daunting at a time of life when you might crave social interaction more than ever.
Gil Baumgarten, founder and president of Segment Wealth Management, says that in this situation, "The math likely works, but the social implications loom large."
On the one hand, Baumgarten points out, people don't always see their closest friends that often. "Calling or FaceTiming can surely close the gap of geographic separation," he says.
Family, however, gets more complex.
"There is no real replacement for cuddling the grandkids on the couch or the glee they express when Grandma or Grandpa walks in the room," Baumgarten says.
While many families navigate this well when the kids move away, and the situation is reversed, he says, you might not realize how difficult it is to be away from loved ones until you try it. This might hold true even if you manage to build a nice circle of friends in your new neighborhood.
If you put yourself out there, you might make friends quickly
If moving means being far from family, that's something you'll need to reconcile. But you might not have to be as concerned about building a new social circle.
As Chuck Czajka, founder of Macro Money Concepts, insists, "Having established friendships where you’re moving to in retirement is not a necessity."
"In retirement, it’s likely you’ll participate in several social activities, so finding friends shouldn’t be an issue," Czajka explains.
He also says that if you're deliberately chasing better weather, that could lead to more activities, whether it's boating, tennis, pickleball, golf or something else.
"My advice is not to worry. Friends will come as long as you’re active in the retirement community," Czajka says.
It pays to test the waters first
If social concerns are stopping your wife from embracing a move to South Carolina, you might want to do a trial run before diving in, says Elias Friedman, founder and senior wealth adviser at Kadima Wealth
"I have had many clients in this situation," he explains. "Clients become tired of long winters, high taxes…and like the idea of 'cashing in their chips' to find a less expensive and warm place to live."
At the same time, Friedman says it's a good idea to try one or two seasons in a new location before committing to a move. Not only that, but he thinks it's a good idea to experience different locations for a point of comparison.
"Try not only South Carolina or Florida but Tennessee, Arizona and maybe even Nevada," he suggests. "These places offer warm weather, lower taxes than New York, and most importantly, have many people like these New York clients relocating there."
While you're considering these locations, find out if your "tribe" of friends is retiring to one state or city, and check that, too.
Friedman also says you might want to approach your move like you would a series of college visits.
"Find a number of towns in a few states," he says. "Do the research ahead of time to narrow down the list to ones that offer you the things that interest you the most, like weather, recreational activities, houses of worship, and health care providers." From there, you can do a series of long-term stays, rank your visits, and make a decision.
If spending an entire season, or several seasons, in a new neighborhood as a trial run isn't feasible, Baumgarten says, "Get an Airbnb for a month in your desired location and test out the situation."
Not only might living in a new neighborhood on a short-term basis allow you to start building local relationships, but you can most likely get a sense of the vibe. If people seem friendly and there's no shortage of activities and resources for people in your situation, then you might feel more comfortable making a move — especially if you go in with the attitude that you're going to put yourselves out there to build a social network and make your new location work.
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