How Does a Gray Divorce Affect Social Security Benefits?
Can you claim your ex-spouse’s Social Security benefits? The answer is yes, as long as you meet certain criteria.
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more. Delivered daily. Enter your email in the box and click Sign Me Up.
You are now subscribed
Your newsletter sign-up was successful
Want to add more newsletters?
Delivered daily
Kiplinger Today
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more delivered daily. Smart money moves start here.
Sent five days a week
Kiplinger A Step Ahead
Get practical help to make better financial decisions in your everyday life, from spending to savings on top deals.
Delivered daily
Kiplinger Closing Bell
Get today's biggest financial and investing headlines delivered to your inbox every day the U.S. stock market is open.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Adviser Intel
Financial pros across the country share best practices and fresh tactics to preserve and grow your wealth.
Delivered weekly
Kiplinger Tax Tips
Trim your federal and state tax bills with practical tax-planning and tax-cutting strategies.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Retirement Tips
Your twice-a-week guide to planning and enjoying a financially secure and richly rewarding retirement
Sent bimonthly.
Kiplinger Adviser Angle
Insights for advisers, wealth managers and other financial professionals.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Investing Weekly
Your twice-a-week roundup of promising stocks, funds, companies and industries you should consider, ones you should avoid, and why.
Sent weekly for six weeks
Kiplinger Invest for Retirement
Your step-by-step six-part series on how to invest for retirement, from devising a successful strategy to exactly which investments to choose.
Editor’s note: This is part one of an ongoing series throughout this year focused on helping older adults navigate the financial difficulties of gray divorce. See below for links to the articles in the series.
People going through “gray divorce” should make it a priority to understand the rules about divorced spouse Social Security benefits to maximize their retirement income.
Social Security benefits are a key component of retirement income and probably the most misunderstood. When it comes to Social Security benefits for older divorced couples, the myths and misunderstandings are amplified.
From just $107.88 $24.99 for Kiplinger Personal Finance
Become a smarter, better informed investor. Subscribe from just $107.88 $24.99, plus get up to 4 Special Issues
Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
What's important to know is that if you are age 62 or older and were married to your ex for 10 consecutive years or longer, you may be able to collect up to half of your former spouse’s Social Security benefit based on their earnings history. But you will get a divorced spouse benefit only if it exceeds your own benefit based on your own earnings record. You will not receive both benefits combined. When someone qualifies for two benefits, the Social Security Administration pays the higher amount.
Other eligibility criteria include:
- Your ex qualifies for retirement benefits or Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI).
- Both you and your ex must be at least age 62 before you can claim as an ex-spouse.
- You must not be remarried.
- You and your ex must be divorced for two years or longer, or your ex must already be claiming retirement benefits.
Here are some common questions I am asked about spousal Social Security benefits:
Do I have to wait for my ex to claim Social Security benefits?
Your former spouse doesn't need to be collecting his or her retirement benefits yet for you to claim ex-spousal benefits. However, if this is the case, the divorce must be at least two years old. (There is no two-year requirement if your ex is already receiving benefits.)
Will my ex's retirement benefit be reduced if I claim on his or her record?
One ex's claim does not reduce or affect the other ex’s benefit in any way.
Should I wait to take my ex-spouse’s benefits at age 70?
The most you can collect in divorced-spouse benefits is 50% of your former mate's primary insurance amount — the monthly payment he or she is entitled to at full retirement age. Unlike retirement benefits, spousal benefits don't continue to grow by 8% per year up to age 70.
Can my ex stop me from claiming benefits based on his or her earnings record?
No, you do not need your ex's permission. He or she will never know whether your retirement benefit was based on his or her work record.
- Nor do you need to discuss your claiming plans with your ex.
- Nor does your ex’s marital status have any bearing on your eligibility to receive ex-spousal benefits.
- Nor can your benefit be reduced or denied if your ex-spouse claims Social Security in a certain way.
Bottom line: Your ex has no influence over your benefits.
What happens if my ex dies?
As with widows and widowers, waiting until you reach the full retirement age (FRA) for survivors entitles you to receive 100% of the amount your late ex was getting from Social Security when he or she died. In most cases, claiming survivor benefits before you reach full retirement age reduces the amount of your benefit.
You qualify for survivor benefits on the work record of a late ex-husband or ex-wife if:
- The marriage lasted at least 10 years.
- You are at least 60 years old (at least 50 if you are disabled).
- You are caring for a child from the previous marriage who is either under 16 or disabled and gets benefits on the record of your former spouse. In this case, there is no age or length-of-marriage minimum.
- You are single, or if you have remarried, you did not do so until after you turned 60 (50 if disabled).
Once again, know that survivor benefits paid to you as a divorced spouse do not affect payments to the late beneficiary’s widow or widower or to other former spouses.
Social Security and divorce is a complicated subject, and you may be in a situation that I didn’t address above. As with anything else in divorce, it pays to be educated about the subject early in the process.
Do your research and contact the Social Security Administration. Provide them proof that you were married and are now divorced and provide them enough information for them to look up your ex’s records. They can be reached at 1-800-772-1213, or www.ssa.gov, or you can visit your local Social Security office.
You should also mention your concerns to your divorce attorney and reach out to a financial adviser, such as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, who specializes in divorce.
Articles in this series
- Introduction: Happy New Year: Let’s Get a Divorce
- Part two: In Gray Divorce, Two Financial Planning Yardsticks Are Key
Related Content
- Five Tips if You’re Getting Divorced in 2024
- You’re Divorcing or Lost Your Spouse: What Do You Do Financially?
- Beware of These Three Hidden Costs of Divorce
- Four Steps to Prepare Your Finances for Divorce
- A Financial Guide to Gray Divorce
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more. Delivered daily. Enter your email in the box and click Sign Me Up.

Andrew Hatherley is the founder of Transcend Retirement, LLC and Wiser Divorce Solutions, LLC and the host of The Gray Divorce Podcast. After going through his own mid-life divorce, Andrew decided to help other people avoid the financial and emotional stress so common to the process. He earned the designation Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® and is trained in mediation and Collaborative Divorce. He is also a member of the Amicable Divorce Network.
-
Quiz: Do You Know How to Avoid the "Medigap Trap?"Quiz Test your basic knowledge of the "Medigap Trap" in our quick quiz.
-
5 Top Tax-Efficient Mutual Funds for Smarter InvestingMutual funds are many things, but "tax-friendly" usually isn't one of them. These are the exceptions.
-
AI Sparks Existential Crisis for Software StocksThe Kiplinger Letter Fears that SaaS subscription software could be rendered obsolete by artificial intelligence make investors jittery.
-
Social Security Break-Even Math Is Helpful, But Don't Let It Dictate When You'll FileYour Social Security break-even age tells you how long you'd need to live for delaying to pay off, but shouldn't be the sole basis for deciding when to claim.
-
I'm an Opportunity Zone Pro: This Is How to Deliver Roth-Like Tax-Free Growth (Without Contribution Limits)Investors who combine Roth IRAs, the gold standard of tax-free savings, with qualified opportunity funds could enjoy decades of tax-free growth.
-
One of the Most Powerful Wealth-Building Moves a Woman Can Make: A Midcareer PivotIf it feels like you can't sustain what you're doing for the next 20 years, it's time for an honest look at what's draining you and what energizes you.
-
I'm a Wealth Adviser Obsessed With Mahjong: Here Are 8 Ways It Can Teach Us How to Manage Our MoneyThis increasingly popular Chinese game can teach us not only how to help manage our money but also how important it is to connect with other people.
-
Looking for a Financial Book That Won't Put Your Young Adult to Sleep? This One Makes 'Cents'"Wealth Your Way" by Cosmo DeStefano offers a highly accessible guide for young adults and their parents on building wealth through simple, consistent habits.
-
Global Uncertainty Has Investors Running Scared: This Is How Advisers Can Reassure ThemHow can advisers reassure clients nervous about their plans in an increasingly complex and rapidly changing world? This conversational framework provides the key.
-
I'm a Real Estate Investing Pro: This Is How to Use 1031 Exchanges to Scale Up Your Real Estate EmpireSmall rental properties can be excellent investments, but you can use 1031 exchanges to transition to commercial real estate for bigger wealth-building.
-
Should You Jump on the Roth Conversion Bandwagon? A Financial Adviser Weighs InRoth conversions are all the rage, but what works well for one household can cause financial strain for another. This is what you should consider before moving ahead.