Caring for Your Aging Parents: A Seven-Step Guide
Caring for aging parents can be draining, but knowing where everyone stands and having critical things in place can at least make the process less stressful.


Aging certainly is part of the circle of life. If we are all fortunate, someday we can repay the favor of our parents caring for us, by caring for them. It is a time in one’s life that does not come easy and should be handled with the utmost care. In my line of work, I witness the tolls and stress caring for an aging parent can have on both the child and the parent. Albeit, no easy task, there are certainly best practices developed by many elder care experts I thought appropriate to share with you here today.
Below is a seven-step guide that is practical and easy to follow for caring for an aging parent (or family member):
1. Assess their needs.
Start by understanding your parents’ specific needs across all facets of their lives. This should span from family support, home safety, medical requirements, cognitive health, mobility, personal care, meal prep, social interaction and exercise. It is important during this stage that you properly evaluate what current support there is in these areas and where additional support/resources are necessary.
From just $107.88 $24.99 for Kiplinger Personal Finance
Be a smarter, better informed investor.

Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
2. Consider your capacity.
Although we all want to be able to help our most precious loved ones, it is important to do some self-assessment of your actual capacity to do so. You should assess your own health, proximity, living preferences and relationship quality with your significant other.
Being able to acknowledge when you are not the appropriate caregiver is just as important as acknowledging when you are the right person. This should allow you to understand where you may need some help and where you might not.
3. Involve your parents.
It is an important step to not make decisions in a vacuum. You should absolutely, assuming they’re able, include your parents in these discussions. It is safe to say they are likely to have some opinions on the who, what and where of their aging needs. I’d also add in here to include your immediate family as well, since, as they say, it will take a village.
4. Understand their finances.
Bet you didn’t see this one coming?! Elder care can be not only physically and mentally draining, but it can also be financially draining. Before curating a care plan, it is important to understand the financial landscape. The questions to be asked are what kind of care do you anticipate your parents needing? What are the estimated future costs of their needs? What do their current finances look like? Is anyone in your family going to assist financially if needed?
Answering these questions can help you assess the financial needs and, thus, understand what the optionality is for care. I’d also highly suggest involving your, or their, financial experts to help assist in this process.
5. Ensure their home safety.
Remember how I mentioned life comes full circle? Bet you remember baby-proofing your home once upon a time so your little ones wouldn’t smash their little heads. Well, full circle, here we come. You will want to “parent-proof” your parents’ home to prevent accidents.
This can entail home modifications, decluttering, installing grab bars, improving lighting and making general accessibility enhancements where needed. This is an important step and one that can enable your loved ones the dignity to stay in their own home for as long as possible.
6. Facilitate communication.
Regardless of your ability to physically care for your loved ones, every one of us can help with a communication plan. This cuts two ways. For starters, you’ll want to make sure your parents have the appropriate accessible communication devices to reach out in times of need.
Additionally, you can help by combatting loneliness. Just because you are super busy every day, doesn’t mean your aging parent is as well. Take time regularly to reach out and check in on these special people. It is the easiest thing to do and likely will go the longest to preserving dignity for all.
7. Explore care options.
The final stage is to fully understand what care options are available. You can take this on yourself or utilize a professional geriatric care manager. You or they can help assess what in-home options or assisted living options are available based on preferences, needs and finances.
Even if you’re not ready to utilize the options today, it is important to know where you are going to turn if/when the comes.
If you follow these seven easy steps, you’ll at least have a good start on handling this difficult time in your lives with dignity. There are plenty of professionals who can help along the way, so take a deep look in the mirror when considering what you are capable of and what you are not. Use help, involve your family and handle it with care. Sending love to all, and stay wealthy, healthy and happy.
Diversified is a registered investment adviser, and the registration of an investment adviser does not imply any specific level of skill or training and does not constitute an endorsement of the firm by the SEC.
A copy of Diversified’s current written disclosure brochure which discusses, among other things, the firm’s business practices, services and fees, is available through the SEC’s website at: www.adviserinfo.sec.gov.
Diversified, LLC does not provide tax advice and should not be relied upon for purposes of filing taxes, estimating tax liabilities or avoiding any tax or penalty imposed by law. The information provided by Diversified, LLC should not be a substitute for consulting a qualified tax advisor, accountant, or other professional concerning the application of tax law or an individual tax situation.
Nothing provided on this site constitutes tax advice. Individuals should seek the advice of their own tax advisor for specific information regarding tax consequences of investments. Investments in securities entail risk and are not suitable for all investors. This site is not a recommendation nor an offer to sell (or solicitation of an offer to buy) securities in the United States or in any other jurisdiction.
Related Content
- What to Discuss With Your Aging Parents as They Get Older
- What Gen X Needs to Know About Their Aging Parents' Finances
- How the Social Security Bridge Strategy Works
- How Average Is Your Net Worth?
- Is Your Spending Out of Control? Three Ways to Fix It
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more. Delivered daily. Enter your email in the box and click Sign Me Up.

In March 2010, Andrew Rosen joined Diversified, bringing with him nine years of financial industry experience. As a financial planner, Andrew forges lifelong relationships with clients, coaching them through all stages of life. He has obtained his Series 6, 7 and 63, along with property/casualty and health/life insurance licenses. Andrew consistently delivers high-level, concierge service to all clients.
-
$40,000 CD vs $40,000 High-Yield Savings Account - 3 Things Savers Should Consider Now
Both options offer risk-free methods to grow your savings. Learn how much you can earn with each, how they differ and which one suits you best.
-
I'm 51 and my portfolio is up. I'm planning to retire at 60 and want to start moving out of stocks. Is that smart?
We ask financial experts for advice.
-
Gray Divorce Can Throw Your Retirement a Curveball: What to Know
If you're entering retirement and going through a divorce at the same time, you've got some work to do to shore up your long-term financial security.
-
I'm a Real Estate Investing Expert: Optional 721 UPREIT DSTs Can Be the Best of Both Worlds
Before investing in any 721 UPREIT exchange, look for one that offers a straightforward, investor-friendly exit.
-
How an Expired Passport Thwarted Blackmail (and What Other Important Documents You Should Keep)
An optometrist produced his expired passport to foil a blackmail attempt by the daughter of a former employee. After proving he was out of the country on the date of a forged diary entry, he took it a step further.
-
Optimize, Grow, Retain: The Power of Annual Client Reviews
Financial advisers can use annual reviews to help enhance client outcomes, strengthen relationships and build their practice.
-
I'm a Real Estate Investing Pro: This Is What Investors Should Know About Truck Stop Investments
Truck stops might seem like good investments, but they can actually be a risky gamble due to unstable fuel prices, unreliable operators and coming changes in transportation. Instead, consider safer options like industrial or residential properties.
-
Don't Disinherit Your Grandchildren: The Hidden Risks of Retirement Account Beneficiary Forms
Standard retirement account beneficiary forms may not be flexible enough to ensure your money passes to family members according to your wishes. Naming a trust as the contingent beneficiary can help avoid these issues. Here's how.
-
This Is How Life Insurance Can Fund Your Dreams Now
Beyond a death benefit, life insurance can provide significant financial value and flexibility through 'living benefits' while you are still alive, helping with expenses like education, business ventures or retirement.
-
Potential Trouble for Retirees: A Wealth Adviser's Guide to the OBBB's Impact on Retirement
While some provisions might help, others could push you into a higher tax bracket and raise your costs. Be strategic about Roth conversions, charitable donations, estate tax plans and health care expenditures.