Thinking of Divorce? Before You Split, You Could Try This 1 Thing Instead
A postnuptial agreement, or post-nup for short, could help you prepare for the future as you try to smooth things out. If things don’t work out, then you’ll be ready. Post-nups can even be helpful for happily married couples, in some cases.

Thinking about divorce? You wouldn’t be alone this year – what with the pandemic causing divorces to spike – or any year, as many couples opt to start the next 12 months fresh by splitting up.
But maybe you’re not ready for your marriage to become another COVID-19 victim. There is an intermediate step you could take before you invest time, money and energy in getting divorced. Instead, you could plan your divorce – with a postnuptial agreement. This step would allow you to work on your relationship while also knowing that if it doesn’t work out you’ve created an outline for how you and your partner will get divorced.
A postnuptial agreement is exactly what it sounds like. It’s an agreement that is made after a couple is married, and it’s about what will happen financially if they divorce. It’s signed by both parties and is notarized and private.

Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free E-Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
Now, a post-nup can’t address what will happen to children, because child custody can’t be covered in a post-nup. There also can’t be any financial incentive for one spouse to leave the marriage.
Here’s a look at why you might consider a post-nup.
1. You’re getting back together after something bad – perhaps an affair.
While you and your spouse have chosen to reconcile, you have also decided to lay out some terms of personal responsibility and accountability. It’s like you’re saying, “If this happens again, this is what we are going to do and how we will handle our money and other assets in our divorce.”
If not infidelity, perhaps your partner has been wastefully spending down assets or even gambling. Or, the issue might be an alcohol or drug abuse problem, and perhaps you or your spouse have been in and out of rehab multiple times.
A post-nup allows you to reconcile without having additional legal exposure financially. In other words, you aren’t penalized financially for giving your marriage another go.
The idea is this: You’re entering into this agreement to move forward in the right direction, to get your marriage back on track. You are going to hold each other accountable. If one of you messes up, you know how you will address your assets when you break up.
2. You need to make a change to your premarital agreement.
If you have a premarital or prenuptial that needs to be changed, that’s also where a post-nup comes in. Say you inherited money and don’t want your spouse to get it if you divorce.
Or, perhaps your pre-nup agreement says in case of divorce there is to be no alimony or division of property, but after many years of marriage your financial situation has changed and that no longer makes sense. Maybe your spouse was the breadwinner when you got married but now you are.
Sometimes big life changes require a couple to change their pre-nup – to account for a new way in which they would want to handle their money in the event of a divorce – and the post-nup is the way they do that. Things change, and sometimes marital agreements must change, too.
3. You or your spouse is entering into a new business arrangement.
Postnuptial agreements are also common when one partner starts a new company or business and doesn’t want the spouse involved in financial decisions or to be able to lay claim to the business in the event of a divorce.
If you are going into business with outside partners, a post-nup could be in order. Your partners might want to ensure that your spouse doesn’t have an interest in the business later in the event you divorce – or even die.
The case for postnuptial agreements is clear: People forget that marriages are financial relationships and business relationships, too. Post-nups help you map out a financial plan as a married couple. And they are made when you both are happily married – or at least working toward that.
It’s much easier to do the right thing when you and your spouse are still in love and working toward a common goal, which is hopefully a life together forever. But if happily ever after doesn’t happen, you’ve done the planning, and hopefully divorcing is less costly, emotionally and financially.
Get Kiplinger Today newsletter — free
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more. Delivered daily. Enter your email in the box and click Sign Me Up.
Tonya Graser Smith is a Board Certified Specialist in Family Law, licensed North Carolina attorney and founder of GraserSmith, PLLC, in Charlotte, N.C. She focuses her practice on divorce, child custody, child support, alimony, equitable distribution, prenuptial agreements and other family law matters.
-
Ten Cheapest Places to Live in Texas
Property Tax Looking for a cheap place to live in Texas? Look no further. These counties have the lowest property tax bills in the Lone Star State.
-
AI Is Missing the Wisdom of Older Adults: What It Means for You
AI will increasingly affect your healthcare and finances, but young workers are primarily designing the systems and getting most of the jobs.
-
The Three C's to Financial Success: A Financial Planner's Guide to Build Wealth
Consistency, commitment and confidence in your chosen strategy are more critical to your financial success than finding the 'perfect' financial plan.
-
A Financial Adviser's Guide to Solving Your Retirement Puzzle: Five Key Pieces
If retirement's a puzzle you're struggling with, try answering these five questions. The answers will guide you toward a solution.
-
You're Close to Retirement and Cashed Out: How Do You Get Back In?
If you've been scared into an all-cash position, it's wise to consider reinvesting your money in the markets. Here's how a financial planner recommends you can get back in the saddle.
-
After the Disaster: An Expert's Guide to Deciding Whether to Rebuild or Relocate
Homeowners hit by disaster must weigh the emotional desire to rebuild against the financial realities of insurance coverage, unexpected costs and future risk.
-
A Financial Expert's Tips for Lending Money to Family and Friends
What starts as a lifeline can turn into a minefield if the borrower ghosts the lender. Following these three steps can help you avoid family feuds over funds.
-
What the HECM? Combine It With a QLAC and See What Happens
Combining a reverse mortgage known as a HECM with a QLAC (qualifying longevity annuity contract) can provide longevity protection, tax savings and liquidity for unplanned expenses.
-
721 UPREIT DSTs: Real Estate Investing Expert Explores the Hidden Risks
Potential investors need to understand the crucial distinction between a REIT's option to buy a Delaware statutory trust's property and its obligation.
-
I'm an Insurance Expert: Yes, You Need Life Insurance Even if the Kids Are Grown and the House Is Paid Off
Life insurance isn't about you. It's about providing for loved ones and covering expenses after you're gone. Here are five key reasons to have it.