Business owners, longtime employees, families — we are all caught up in life’s challenges. Things go along more or less the same day after day, and then, out of the blue, come the words no one ever wants to hear: It’s terminal.
“So many people — either those who have received that diagnosis or their employees and family members — are frozen with fear of the unknown,” says author Suzanne B. O’Brien, R.N.
Her goal: “Provide knowledge and a road map through one of life’s most difficult times.”
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In her new book, The Good Death: Supporting Your Loved One Through the End of Life, O’Brien has distilled over 20 years of experience as a hospice nurse and palliative care professional into a practical guide for what can be done to help the dying person, caregivers and families, shining a brilliant light on a path through each stage of death with understanding and confidence.
If you know someone who is now facing a terminal diagnosis, The Good Death should be their/your road map. “End-of-life education,” O’Brien stresses, “has significant benefits for everyone, especially business owners.”
How to ensure that your business will survive
In her presentations, O’Brien asks CEOs of Fortune 500 companies and small, family-owned shops, “If you were suddenly removed from that space, would your business disappear?”
She cites three critical issues that must be addressed well before bad news arrives to minimize that possibility:
- A succession plan, including the correct paperwork
- Insurance that protects the business if you die or become disabled, known as key-employee insurance
- Already-trained employees who are able to assume your duties
However, O’Brien looks not only at the impact of an owner’s death on a business, but also what happens when an employee is ill or dies.
“Often, it is pure chaos, both for the enterprise and its employees. Your company’s very continuity can be at risk, as the emotional costs of a loss are often severe and disruptive. Therefore, well in advance of that day arriving, management needs to ask: What are the tools that I can supply my employees with that will enable them to deal with one of the most stressful times in their lives?”
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She answers that question by saying, “When employers take those steps to understand the human element and bring in resources to assist employees, this will make a difficult time go so much easier. This is what end-of-life education can do. By developing procedures tailored to your company — a step-by-step approach that addresses practical issues and how to deal with them — peace of mind is thereby created.”
If you weren't here, would this come to an end?
Loss of job security ranks near the top of the list of what employees fear most. Anxiety and fear are how management consultants describe the impact on employees when learning of an owner’s illness.
O’Brien feels strongly “that employers need to reassure their people that, if they were not here, this business will go on. You want them to feel part of the company, appreciated and that you as an owner have done your due diligence and can say, ‘If I were not able to be here, we have this and this and this instituted, so that it can go on, as our mission is larger than one person.’
“You want to give them a sense of entitlement, a buy-in so they don’t have to worry if I am aging out or so unhealthy that their job and family’s security is at risk. This requires training the people you work with and establishing standard operating procedures (SOPs) so those gaps can be filled in — so that the future of the company is not in the hands of just one person.”
Peace of mind derived from planning ahead
O’Brien identifies five issues that people need to address so that they may have peace at the end of their lives:
- Deciding where you want to be cared for at the end.
- Coming to terms with regrets and saying “I’m sorry.” Ensuring you spend time with loved ones to say goodbye.
- Accepting that a good death is really a good life, and that means living with the awareness that time is your greatest commodity. Hopefully, you can say, “I lived well.”
- Finding your spiritual peace of mind.
- Leaving behind organized financial paperwork.
That last one “is a big one,” O’Brien says. “There are things we all need to make decisions about so that our loved ones are not left trying to figure it all out.” She notes that among the greatest gifts you can give your family is access to your financial records, will, passwords, asset titles and key to the safe-deposit box.
Concluding our interview, I asked O’Brien about the most common regret she’s heard from people at the end of their lives. She said:
“‘I thought I had more time.’”
Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield, Calif., and welcomes comments and questions from readers, which may be faxed to (661) 323-7993, or e-mailed to Lagombeaver1@gmail.com. And be sure to visit dennisbeaver.com.
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