6 Things Married Couples Should Talk About When Planning for Retirement
Get on the same page as soon as possible, so you can help ensure you retire happily ever after together.
When they discuss the future, couples in their 50s and 60s often put the focus on their children and grandchildren or the needs of their aging parents. If they get around to talking about themselves at all, they might discuss an upcoming vacation or something that needs fixing around the house.
But what they tend to skip over is what will happen to them once they retire—and that's a mistake.
What will their life together look like? Do their individual visions match up or is there a complete disconnect?
From just $107.88 $24.99 for Kiplinger Personal Finance
Become a smarter, better informed investor. Subscribe from just $107.88 $24.99, plus get up to 4 Special Issues
Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
I'm amazed at the basic issues couples haven't talked about together before they come to talk to their financial professionals. Here are a few that stand out:
1. What does retirement mean to each of you?
Maybe one of you wants to travel, and the other wants to spend more time at home, gardening or helping out with the grandkids. That's okay—as long as you have a plan to make it work. Talk about your goals and dreams now so you can work toward making them mesh later on.
2. At what age do you plan to retire?
It's surprising how often couples ignore this topic—and then argue about it later. Some are disappointed when they learn their spouse doesn't want to head off into the sunset as soon as possible. Others—worried about money or if they'll get along if they're together all the time—push for age 70 or beyond. A 2011 Fidelity study found that 62% of couples didn't agree on the appropriate retirement age. Discuss your concerns now.
3. How much money do you have—and where is it?
In most households, one person takes on the bulk of the responsibility for handling the money. And that's fine. But there's no excuse for being totally clueless about your retirement income. Both spouses should know their financial professional, and stay up on what's happening with savings and investments. Also, both you should be aware of where the paperwork is filed and whose name is on what.
4. What is your idea of risk?
Women tend to be more risk-averse than men, but sometimes it's the other way around. Regardless, I've watched many clients go wide-eyed when they saw what their spouse was willing to gamble with the hope of getting a bigger payback. Make sure you're on the same page on this one, or it could lead to bitterness and resentment in the future.
5. What happens to your income when one of you dies?
This takes the third point above a little bit further: Both spouses should know about pension rules, Social Security changes and insurance payouts. Don't make the mistake of thinking that when you're gone, your spouse will only need half as much money. There should be a plan in place to cover the surviving spouse's needs.
6. Are you going to leave money to your kids? If so, how much?
Don't assume everything you have left when you die will go to your children. Taxes and other costs can eat away at your legacy. Talk to each other about how you want to handle your estate—and then talk to a qualified financial professional and attorney.
When you have these retirement conversations, expect to have some disagreements, but keep looking for compromise. And don't hesitate to consult your financial professional—or a marriage counselor—for some assistance.
Steve Fullerton is co-founder of Fullerton Financial Planning and is FINRA licensed with Series 7, 63 and 66, as well as health and life. He is the founder and president of Kingdom Financial Group LLC, a Registered Investment Advisor with the SEC.
Stephanie Fullerton and Kim Franke-Folstad contributed to this article.
Investment advisory services offered through Kingdom Financial Group LLC, an SEC Registered Investment Adviser. We are an independent firm helping individuals make retirement income planning more successful by using a variety of strategies to custom suit their needs and objectives. By contacting us you may be provided information about insurance products and investment opportunities. Annuity product guarantees are subject to the claims-paying ability of the issuing company, and are not offered by Kingdom Financial Group LLC.
-
Forget FIRE: Why ‘FILE’ Is the Smarter Move for Child-Free DINKsHow shifting from "Retiring Early" to "Living Early" allows child-free adults to enjoy their wealth while they’re still young enough to use it.
-
7 Tax Blunders to Avoid in Your First Year of RetirementA business-as-usual approach to taxes in the first year of retirement can lead to silly trip-ups that erode your nest egg. Here are seven common goofs to avoid.
-
How to Plan for Social Security in 2026's Changing LandscapeNot understanding how the upcoming changes in 2026 might affect you could put your financial security in retirement at risk. This is what you need to know.
-
7 Tax Blunders to Avoid in Your First Year of Retirement, From a Seasoned Financial Planner
A business-as-usual approach to taxes in the first year of retirement can lead to silly trip-ups that erode your nest egg. Here are seven common goofs to avoid.
-
How to Plan for Social Security in 2026's Changing Landscape, From a Financial Professional
Not understanding how the upcoming changes in 2026 might affect you could put your financial security in retirement at risk. This is what you need to know.
-
6 Overlooked Areas That Can Make or Break Your Retirement, From a Retirement AdviserIf you're heading into retirement with scattered and uncertain plans, distilling them into these six areas can ensure you thrive in later life.
-
I'm a Wealth Adviser: These Are the 7 Risks Your Retirement Plan Should AddressYour retirement needs to be able to withstand several major threats, including inflation, longevity, long-term care costs, market swings and more.
-
High-Net-Worth Retirees: Don't Overlook These Benefits of Social SecurityWealthy retirees often overlook Social Security. But timed properly, it can drive tax efficiency, keep Medicare costs in check and strengthen your legacy.
-
Do You Have an Insurance Coverage Gap for Your Valuables? You May Be Surprised to Learn You DoStandard homeowners insurance usually has strict limits on high-value items, so you should formally "schedule" these valuable possessions with your insurer.
-
8 Practical Ways to Declutter Your Life in 2026: A Retirement 'Non-Resolution' ChecklistHere's how to stop wasting your energy on things that don't enhance your new chapter and focus on the things that do.
-
To Retire Rich, Stop Chasing Huge Returns and Do This Instead, Courtesy of a Financial PlannerSaving a large percentage of your income, minimizing taxes and keeping spending in check can offer a more realistic path to retiring rich.
