As we celebrate national Women’s History Month this March, it’s a great moment to take a look at all of the pressures and pulls on women’s time and energy. The pandemic has exacerbated the “typical” issues facing the sandwich generation by creating even more challenges for women, in particular. This should no longer be called the sandwich generation for women, but instead, the club sandwich generation.
The Sandwich Generation
This clever term refers to the generation (consisting of women, in most cases) being caught, or sandwiched, between kids who are struggling financially and need help and elderly parents who are also struggling and need help. These simultaneous burdens on women during the pandemic have heightened their financial and emotional stress.
Women, in greater numbers than men, have had to take off work to care for kids who couldn’t go to school; take off time from work to care for their adult children returning to the nest because they may have lost their jobs or became ill; and also, take time off to care for and take parents to doctors.
From just $107.88 $24.99 for Kiplinger Personal Finance
Be a smarter, better informed investor.
Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
Why the Big Deal?
It’s because the real “meat in the sandwich” (women) are worried about not having enough “bread” to support all the generations relying upon them for financial help. The pressures mount as life shifts. People are living longer, which is great, but that also means that elderly parents may need more help for a longer period of time. That translates into the sandwich generation often having to give up their work to care for their parents. The sandwiched women may be raising their own younger kids, and then couple that with their older kids moving back home, and we have a recipe for real financial burden.
The big deal is that women are still the caregivers, in most cases. They are pulled in too many directions. As discussed, the pandemic forced many to leave the workplace to handle all of these circumstances. Many moms are single and are under even more pressure.
What Can Be Done?
Take a Deep Breath
The first thing to consider is to try to balance all of your obligations and try not to be stretched so thin that you burn out because so many people depend upon you. Although it may sound impossible, you need to even schedule a daily “time-out” for yourself to take a walk or to meet or Zoom with a friend. Once you do, you’ll be more “present” to help the others in your life.
Have the Talks
Talk to your kids and parents about sharing all the household responsibilities. Older kids may have to pitch in with caring for their grandparents. Maybe older kids could help with cleaning the house and taking Grandma or Grandpa to the doctor. Younger kids can even help by spending time with their grandparents. They could play cards or Scrabble or a watch TV with them. Also, grandparents may be healthy enough to be in charge of the younger kids’ homework, or babysitting for them. This will not only free up some time for you, but may save you some money, as well.
Craft a Family Budget
Design a family budget with the whole family, all of the generations, in mind. The adult kids may have to take jobs that don’t meet their expectations. Be honest about what you can and can’t afford. Ask each member what they are willing to sacrifice. Give them each a goal to reduce their expenditures. Maybe they each have to figure out how to save, say, $50 a week to contribute back into the family budget. Let them come up with ways to save. If your parents shouldn’t be driving, it is a perfect time to get rid of their car and insurance costs.
Your younger kids can think about cutting down on family discretionary spending on entertainment; everything from designer coffee to streaming services. Set up a family challenge to rotate the making of meals, including the freezing of an extra meal. This will help you to save time and money. Shop in bulk. You get the point.
Don’t Touch Your Retirement Savings
It’s tempting to start to liquidate or borrow from your retirement savings, but there are consequences. Try not to touch that money, because it’s so hard to build that back up again. Think about the consequences of you just kicking the can down the road for your kids, who could then become the next sandwich generation financially caring for you.
Seek Help
There are lots of professionals to help you to navigate these choppy financial waters and to design a plan forward. Also, many communities are offering support groups; you are not alone. You may learn of new resources and coping skills. You may have thought somewhere in your mind that this could happen, but you can’t understand it until you are knee-deep in the situation.
We know that you are capable of doing everything — work, family, friends, volunteering, all of it. Let’s face it, as we look at celebrating Women’s History Month, you need to also celebrate yourself. You are the lynchpin of the family.
-
The Most Tax-Friendly States for Investing in 2025 (Hint: There Are Two)State Taxes Living in one of these places could lower your 2025 investment taxes — especially if you invest in real estate.
-
Want To Retire at 55? See If You Can Answer These Five QuestionsWho said you can’t retire at 55? If you say yes to these questions, you may be on your way to an early retirement.
-
Potential Trouble for Retirees: A Wealth Adviser's Guide to the OBBB's Impact on RetirementWhile some provisions might help, others could push you into a higher tax bracket and raise your costs. Be strategic about Roth conversions, charitable donations, estate tax plans and health care expenditures.
-
One Small Step for Your Money, One Giant Leap for RetirementSaving enough for retirement can sound as daunting as walking on the moon. But what would your future look like if you took one small step toward it this year?
-
This Is What You Really Need to Know About Medicare, From a Financial ExpertHealth care costs are a significant retirement expense, and Medicare offers essential but complex coverage that requires careful planning. Here's how to navigate Medicare's various parts, enrollment periods and income-based costs.
-
I'm a Financial Planner: Could Partial Retirement Be the Right Move for You?Many Americans close to retirement are questioning whether they should take the full leap into retirement or continue to work part-time.
-
From Mortgages to Taxes to Estates: How to Prepare for Falling Interest RatesAs speculation grows that the Federal Reserve will soon start lowering interest rates, now is a good time to review your financial plans for housing, estate, taxes, investing and retirement to make the most of potential changes.
-
This Is How Lottery Winners Build Lasting Legacies, From a Financial ProfessionalWinning a massive lottery jackpot, like the recent $1.4 billion Powerball, requires seeking immediate legal and financial counsel, protecting your identity and winnings and planning your legacy.
-
I'm an Investment Strategist: This Is How the Fed's Next Rate Move Could Impact Your WalletInterest rate cuts might be coming, which could affect everything from your credit card debt to your mortgage. It's smart to prepare now — here's how.
-
I'm a Retirement Planner: These Are Three Common Tax Mistakes You Could Be Making With Your InvestmentsDon't pay more tax on your investments than you need to. You can keep more money in your pocket (or for retirement) by avoiding these three common mistakes.
