Meaningful New Year's Resolutions for Grandparents Who Really Care
It's time to change how we think about resolutions. They can still deal with finances, but maybe they should focus on our most important asset, our grandchildren and the type of legacy we want to leave them.
You are now subscribed
Your newsletter sign-up was successful
Want to add more newsletters?
Delivered daily
Kiplinger Today
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more delivered daily. Smart money moves start here.
Sent five days a week
Kiplinger A Step Ahead
Get practical help to make better financial decisions in your everyday life, from spending to savings on top deals.
Delivered daily
Kiplinger Closing Bell
Get today's biggest financial and investing headlines delivered to your inbox every day the U.S. stock market is open.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Adviser Intel
Financial pros across the country share best practices and fresh tactics to preserve and grow your wealth.
Delivered weekly
Kiplinger Tax Tips
Trim your federal and state tax bills with practical tax-planning and tax-cutting strategies.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Retirement Tips
Your twice-a-week guide to planning and enjoying a financially secure and richly rewarding retirement
Sent bimonthly.
Kiplinger Adviser Angle
Insights for advisers, wealth managers and other financial professionals.
Sent twice a week
Kiplinger Investing Weekly
Your twice-a-week roundup of promising stocks, funds, companies and industries you should consider, ones you should avoid, and why.
Sent weekly for six weeks
Kiplinger Invest for Retirement
Your step-by-step six-part series on how to invest for retirement, from devising a successful strategy to exactly which investments to choose.
Happy New Year! The ball is about to drop, and the revelry is just beginning; there’s no better time to reflect upon last year and consider some changes for 2019.
Are you dreading the phrase, “New Year’s Resolutions?” I am, because the first one always involves dieting. Time to hit the salad bar. If you are like most people, after we resolve to lose weight, our next most popular resolution usually centers around our money habits. You know the drill … shed the debt, save more and spend less. However, as February creeps in, so do the burgers and fries, not to mention, the credit cards. Many of us have a tough time sticking to the promises we make to ourselves.
Who Thought of New Year’s Resolutions, Anyway?
According to History.com, “The practice of making resolutions for the new year is thought to have first caught on among the ancient Babylonians, who made promises in order to earn the favor of the gods and start the year off on the right foot. (They would reportedly vow to pay off debts and return borrowed farm equipment.)”
From just $107.88 $24.99 for Kiplinger Personal Finance
Become a smarter, better informed investor. Subscribe from just $107.88 $24.99, plus get up to 4 Special Issues
Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
I’m not sure if they were more successful in paying off debt than we are today (and I’m also not sure about how much farm equipment was returned). It’s nice to know that “shedding pounds” is a modern problem and the words “salad bar” were not in their lexicon.
NEW New Year’s Resolutions
How about if we change the dialog and set up resolutions that still can deal with money, but focus on our most important asset: our grandchildren? Maybe it’s time to focus on the real legacy we want to leave. Maybe it’s time to design that legacy and resolve to share that with our next generation of loved ones while we are alive.
What Is Your Legacy?
Is your legacy the money you will leave or the memories you will leave? You know that this is a rhetorical question, but sometimes we get caught up in the money because it is tangible. It is not to say that this divvying of the material should not be dealt with. By the way, if this is not dealt with while you are alive, it will be after your death; and perhaps with the consequences that you most dread. More families are pulled apart because of money issues. Don’t set your kids and grandkids up to hear about your wishes when they are sitting in front of an unknown financial expert after your death.
The Money: All Children and Grandchildren Are Not Created Equal
Because all kids are not created equal, in death, you don’t have to treat them as such. You may have special needs grandchildren who may require lifetime care. These issues have to be dealt with. Trusts may have to be established to provide for those situations. The biggest issue is to explain your intentions to all who are involved. (I feel a New Year’s Resolution developing.)
You also may have kids or grandkids that may have a profession that does not pay as lucratively as others in the family. Therefore, you may decide to leave your concert violinist grandchild more money than your investment banker grandchild. Again, the issue is to explain this to your loved ones before your death. (Do you feel another New Year’s Resolution coming on?)
Memories
Memories are intangible, but very real, nonetheless to the loved ones holding onto them. I remember my grandma Jewel lugging her homemade chicken soup and matzo balls to our house every week because she knew how excited I was to come home from school to find her there with a piping hot bowl of love. We would sit for hours and talk. In fact, I spoke to her every day of my life until her death at almost 100 years. Yes, another memory was her teaching me how to make her matzo balls and her never commenting to me that hockey pucks tasted better. Of course, money was left, but it was never about the money.
You are alive. The biggest resolution you can make now is to get on that memory train and create new meaning in your relationships with your grandchildren. These don’t have to be huge. They only need to involve time and love. Keep “stuff” out of it. Your grandchildren may think that a new iPad is the legacy they want, but trust me, when you pass, that will not be what they remembered you for.
Famed banker David Rockefeller told me something really interesting once. I used to work with him when I was at Chase Bank. He was reminiscing about how his family was really close and how they did lots of things together. He talked about the fact that the meaning for him was never about the family’s wealth. He quipped, “You will never see a hearse with a luggage rack.”
Be the Change
Make sure that your New Year’s Resolutions are your goals, not someone else’s hopes for you and your loved ones. Don’t just pop the bubbly and say you are going to change because the new year is here and you are wearing those goofy 2019 sparkle sunglasses.
Change is about you and your life. Remember, your resolutions begin with you and the life you want and the legacy you leave.
Happy New Year.
-
Stocks Shrug Off Tariff Ruling, Weak GDP: Stock Market TodayMarket participants had plenty of news to sift through on Friday, including updates on inflation and economic growth and a key court ruling.
-
You Received a Life Insurance Payout. Here's How to Avoid an IRS Audit.You received a big check from your loved one's life insurance policy. Will the IRS be expecting a check from you now?
-
Supreme Court Strikes Down Trump Tariffs: What's Next for Consumers and Retailers?Tax Law This landmark decision will reshape U.S. trade policy and could define the outer boundaries of presidential economic power for years to come.
-
I'm a Financial Planner: This Is How You Can Legally Divorce the IRS for the Rest of Your LifeWith some careful planning focused on the standard deduction, retirees who have large sums in tax-deferred accounts can avoid unpleasant tax bills and even part ways with the IRS for good.
-
9 Ways the Wealthy Waste Thousands in Taxes: A Checklist for What Not to MissThe tax code contains plenty of legitimate ways for the wealthy and business owners to cut taxes. Use this checklist to minimize taxes and stay compliant.
-
When Estate Plans Don't Include Tax Plans, All Bets Are Off: 2 Financial Advisers Explain WhyEstate plans aren't as effective as they can be if tax plans are considered separately. Here's what you stand to gain when the two strategies are aligned.
-
Counting on Real Estate to Fund Your Retirement? Avoid These 3 Costly MistakesThe keys to successful real estate planning for retirees: Stop thinking of property income as a reliable paycheck, start planning for tax consequences and structure your assets early to maintain flexibility.
-
I'm a Financial Planner: These Small Money Habits Stick (and Now Is the Perfect Time to Adopt Them)February gets a bad rap for being the month when resolutions fade — in fact, it's the perfect time to reset and focus on small changes that actually pay off.
-
Social Security Break-Even Math Is Helpful, But Don't Let It Dictate When You'll FileYour Social Security break-even age tells you how long you'd need to live for delaying to pay off, but shouldn't be the sole basis for deciding when to claim.
-
I'm an Opportunity Zone Pro: This Is How to Deliver Roth-Like Tax-Free Growth (Without Contribution Limits)Investors who combine Roth IRAs, the gold standard of tax-free savings, with qualified opportunity funds could enjoy decades of tax-free growth.
-
One of the Most Powerful Wealth-Building Moves a Woman Can Make: A Midcareer PivotIf it feels like you can't sustain what you're doing for the next 20 years, it's time for an honest look at what's draining you and what energizes you.
