The holidays provide a cozy time to discuss your family's financial future while everyone is together for a few days. It's an opportunity to share stories, to pass down lessons learned in hard times and to convey the connection and resilience of family. You may not want to talk about estate planning and inheritances around the table, but arrange for some time over the break to have these conversations.
Studies show that families often avoid or put off talking about their finances. Money talk remains taboo across almost every aspect of modern society: economically, educationally and culturally, according to research from Fidelity. Most of those surveyed by Fidelity (56%) say that money wasn’t discussed at home or growing up. An overwhelming majority (81%) said they "would have benefited from financial education at an earlier age."
On the bright side, four out of five survey respondents believe that it's important to speak to younger people in their lives and 66% say they are already having those conversations. Having these conversations is important, and Thanksgiving is the perfect time to start. Consider bringing up the following financial topics at this year’s Thanksgiving table.
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1. Financial gratitude
First things first. The relationship between gratitude and Thanksgiving is deeply ingrained in the holiday. Some of us grew up going around the table and sharing something we’re thankful for each year. A focus on family financial gratitude can help your loved ones feel more content with what they have and not stress as much about what they’re lacking.
Start the conversation by sharing what you are grateful to be able to look forward to and ask your family to share as well. Gratitude reduces envy and jealousy. And being envious or jealous of someone can lead to resentment. Practicing gratitude can help shift the focus away from other people’s possessions and to what you have that you can be thankful for, according to research.com.
2. Financial accomplishments
Take a moment to celebrate each other’s financial wins. Recognizing these accomplishments can serve as a positive example for the younger generation.
You can start the conversation by posing positive questions: Did anyone adopt a positive money habit? Did anyone hold off buying an item you may not need? Did anyone reprioritize spending or tighten their budget to accomplish a goal?
Noting the positives can help people acknowledge the good things they're doing and foster mindful money management. Mindfulness helps you pause and assess whether a spending decision aligns with what matters, leading to better saving and spending choices.
"Gratitude turns what we have into enough."
- Author Unknown
3. Luxury vs necessity
"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough," is a quote attributed to Oprah Winfrey. It eloquently emphasizes that gratitude for what you have is more fulfilling than what you may long for.
In an age of hyper-consumerism, it's important to teach younger generations to recognize the difference between need and want. Advertisements and influencers often emphasize the need for items that are often not necessary. Trying to keep up with the Joneses has taken on new connotations in the age of social media. In the past, people might have just envied their neighbors, but now we can compare ourselves with everyone worldwide.
4. Setting financial goals
Having a financial goal provides a clear direction for your financial journey. It helps prioritize spending and saving, ensuring financial decisions align with objectives. Financial goals promote financial discipline, reduce stress and facilitate better decision-making.
It can sometimes seem like an overwhelming task to save for the future. Discuss how to prioritize goals, create a budget and adjust goals and plans as needed. If you are financially able, offer to match a savings goal. It doesn't have to be a dollar-for-dollar match.
Share stories of delayed gratification and how that impacted your life positively. For instance, saving for a home takes consistent saving and budgeting. Explain how the sustained sacrifice needed to save leads to realizing goals, such as buying your first home, and builds confidence to tackle other life challenges.
Be a financial role model
Ultimately, the best way for you to teach younger generations about personal finance is to be a good role model. Talk to them about your own goals and your progress in reaching them. Share your setbacks and how you overcame them. And think back to when you were a child at the holiday table. What financial lessons did your parents or grandparents pass down to you that you'd like to see carry forward?
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Donna joined Kiplinger as a personal finance writer in 2023. She spent more than a decade as the contributing editor of J.K.Lasser's Your Income Tax Guide and edited state specific legal treatises at ALM Media. She has shared her expertise as a guest on Bloomberg, CNN, Fox, NPR, CNBC and many other media outlets around the nation. She is a graduate of Brooklyn Law School and the University at Buffalo.
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